WHY AM I MARRIED

[GfL]

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.

At a cocktail party, one man said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong woman."

A guy inserted an ad in the classifieds:
"Wife Wanted".
Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

A man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

A young son asked,
"Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."

Then there was a man who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.

First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

" A Man's Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a woman, to Love and to
forgive her, and for patience, For hermoods. Because Lord, if I pray for
Strength, I'll just beat her to death."

[Guns]

LOL 

[H]

LOL

[Apache]

Oh, if only my wife didn't have access to the computer!!!!

[PekUSA]

And married men don't actually live longer, it just seems like it.